„And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad.“ -C.S. Lewis
One thing I’m pretty sure of: „to change“ means „to leave the comfort zone“. (I’ll confess: I too, am a creature of comfort.) Yet, my experience has proven that by taking it just one step at a time, change really does kinda seem to happen – and it turns out that it isn’t as tough / bad / hard / impossible as it seemed for me to be at first.
Yes, there are different levels of change. Big, scary, hairy changes and little, teensy, tiny ones. And yes, there is a difference between being brave about tackling a do-able change and taking ridiculous risks.
Yet, I decided to stop worrying about change – about mistakes; what other people think; what could go wrong (or right); or those zillion other nagging thoughts about those things that haven’t even happened and yet still somehow persist to keep a person’s mind busy. And this is what I found out: when you turn off the chatter you are sure to find out that you, yourself hold the reins, are at the steering wheel, are the navigator and the captain. So, to stop worrying was the first step for me towards making change happen.
„Stop worrying?“, you ask, „There is so much to think about! So much to plan, to organize, to make happen. So much that could go wrong. A chance that things would be disastrous. How could I not worry!?!?“
This is what I have learned: the first step towards stopping the analysis-paralysis that keeps your mind busy with worry, but your change plans – your future! – on ice, is to accept: that I (and you) will probably fail at one point or another.
But then again, to do well, at least better than before, I have at least learned something. So I have learned to accept that something may go wrong. Something might not work out like how I planned for it to, or would like for it to be. But hey, guess what?! I’ve come to accept that, too! In the meantime I even think that a failure is good news! Because I am building my success on the failures where I have learned something. And I am moving: forwards, sideways, back and forth. I am constantly learning and growing and making new experiences – from which I further learn and grow. I intend to be the maker of my own destiny, to be at the controls of my life. I accept that things won’t always go the way I want them to, but I am not just letting life happen to me.
So let me encourage you: go get ready, (if you feel you have to, brace yourself), and go get started on that change. Sometimes it makes sense to start small even if your plan is to go big. So why not start right now – this very minute – and find a little thing you could do right now, that supports your desired change, and just do it – move on that little thing.
Once you’ve started on your change journey, then remember to relax and allow change to happen. You could even go so far as to step out of the situation and to take the role of spectator, and look upon the change as a story being told. Be sure to look at the entire story: Where did your protagonist start? What did she have to master? Who has crossed her path? How far has she come since she started? Look at the whole story and you’ll probably be pleasantly surprised at what you will see! And when you step back into the story, be especially proud of the lessons that you will have inevitably learned when you started those changes. One in particular is important: you will have become more adept at change.
Ask yourself a few questions to find out how you can „hatch“ before you „go bad“!
When you are in a change situation, you are finding solutions, and you are most likely being very creative – you are letting the ingenious person you were always meant to be, shine. So mastering change makes you better at – well, I’d say, almost – everything that requires creativity!
So what is it exactly, that you want to change? And where are you in that change process? Have you given any thought to what you may be doing that is actually sabotaging your efforts to really make that change? While we’re at it: What exactly, are you doing right now to make that desired change? If you’re not in the middle of the process somewhere, then what do you think is holding you back from really moving forward on your desired change?
Could it be fear? Could it be you are holding on to something that isn’t working for you? If fear – then of what? Of failure? Or of success?
Of being ridiculed? Or of being worshiped? Of not reaching your ever-so-high ambitious goals? Or of falling off the pedestal? Of losing something or someone? Or of gaining something or someone? What are you holding onto that in reality, is holding you back?
Image courtesy of satit_srihin at FreeDigitalPhotos.net